St Valentine's Day

+ Cardinal George Pell, Archbishop of Sydney
14 Feb 2010

St Valentine's Day has changed a lot since I was young. Catholics knew it then as the feast day of saint. Today, the "Saint" in "St Valentine's Day" has been dropped, and it is mainly an occasion for people in all sorts of relationships to buy each other flowers and chocolates.

St Valentine was a priest who lived in Rome in the third century. Emperor Claudius II suspended weddings to keep men single so that they could be recruited into the army. Needless to say, this caused quite a bit of heartburn among young couples. St Valentine decided to defy the Emperor and celebrate marriages in secret.
 
For this he was jailed and eventually beheaded on 14 February 269. One legend is that he restored the sight of a jailer's daughter. He wrote her a farewell letter the night before his execution, signing it "From your Valentine".

St Valentine was dedicated to helping young couples make a life together in marriage. Because of this, he became the patron saint of the engaged and happy marriages.

Belief in marriage is still strong in our society, even as the pressures against it have increased. Divorce has obviously played a big part. The suffering it causes can turn children away from marriage altogether. For others it creates a longing for a happy marriage without the benefit of having had your parents show you how to make it work.

Most marriages in Australia today are preceded by couples living together for an extended period. It used to be claimed that this would make marriages stronger. No one believes this now. It is very easy today to drift into cohabitation and to keep drifting along with it. Passively going along with things is not a good foundation for marriage. A loving and life-long marriage requires a choice and an active commitment to making a life together.

It can be hard work, mainly because of the effort husband and wife have to make to become less selfish, more generous, and more ready to put spouse and children ahead of themselves. In work, sport and education we know that success is all the more enjoyable the harder we have worked for it. This applies to marriage and family too.

We need to do more to help young people realise their ambitions for marriage. A good thing to think about on St Valentine's day.