The Gold Standard for Family Life
+ Cardinal George Pell, Archbishop of Sydney
25 Oct 2009
It's much easier when there are two parents to look after the children. They get an enormous head-start when both their parents bring them up together effectively and affectionately.
About three-quarters of Australian children grow up with both their natural parents. Another eight per cent grow up in step- or "blended" families, created when one of their parents re-partners with someone with their own children, or with whom they have more children.
The remaining eighteen per cent are brought up by one parent only, usually the mother.
I have immense respect for single parents who have to work so much harder with so little support to bring up their children. I feel for them, especially when they find themselves in this situation through no fault of their own.
Relationships do break down but this is not what most people are hoping for when they start a relationship, and particularly when they decide to have children. No one should be forced to stay in an abusive or violent relationship, which can also be disastrous for children.
But we need to pay more attention to the costs that marriage and family breakdown bring to everyone: children first of all, but also parents and the wider community.
There is now a mountain of evidence proving what most people know from common sense: marriage is streets ahead of every other relationship or family form in maximising happiness, well-being and success for adults and children. Communities where most families are based on marriage are stronger and happier than other communities.
While 73 per cent of Australian children are being brought by their natural parents, not all of them are married. The Bureau of Statistics talks of "couple families" which include not only married couples, but de facto and same-sex couples as well! Why the ABS has made this strange choice is unclear. It certainly makes it difficult to find out how many children are being brought up by their married natural parents.
In 1955 98 per cent of children were born to married parents. Today it is something like two out of three. This is significant because de facto couples break up at a much higher rate than married couples, making for more single-parent families.
Marriage is based on a commitment. Cohabitation is something people drift into and stay in from inertia. When the pressure is on, commitment beats drift every time.
